Have you realized it’s October yet? But actually. Where has the time gone?
It seems as though I’ve been back in the Bull City for only about five minutes, but we’ve had six weeks of classes. I’ve been crazy busy and in perfect timing, fall break started today at 11:15 a.m. (It’s technically reading week, but we all know what’s up!)
Amidst the busy, I sat down with my church’s groups pastor about a week ago. True to page six in the handbook for pastors, he asked how he could pray for me as we wrapped up.
I took a deep breath, looked him dead in the face, and said, “You know…I’m good!”
I was as shocked as he was.
When we ask someone how we can pray for them, we often hear something that needs to be fixed: financial stress, healing, lack of wisdom, discernment…those sorts of things. And those are all honorable prayers. But right now, I’m good. I don’t want anything to be different. I’m praying that everything stays exactly the way it is.
Coming back to the place that shaped me so much in a single semester, I expected an experience much like the last. It’s been a total 180.
I’m growing in my faith at church and in the classroom. I get to help lead our student ministry. I find myself able to make time for friends. I enjoy my part-time job. I have all of the “good things” without any sign of the stressful things fall 2016 had to offer.
So…I’m good. Peachy even. Thanks for asking!
Now, what kind of pastoral candidate would I be if I refused prayer? I accepted of course!
This prayer sounded different than April’s. I got to sit with Jordan and acknowledge the extreme dose of grace I’m experiencing. For the first time in a little while now, I feel like I can enter the throne room and leave my phone on do not disturb. I actually feel the presence of God each day. I wake up and my bucket is filled – not because of the rocks I put in it, but because of the water God pours in abundantly as a reminder that I have been baptized in His grace.
Is stress or pain around the corner? Maybe. Probably. Whatever. I’ll handle that when the time comes. Right now, I get to be joyful. I get to sit in the presence of God and recognize all the amazing things going on around me. For me. I get to be reminded each day that even though it seems like I don’t need anything right now, it was grace that came before me and filled my greatest needs. To this grace I did not deserve, I am eternally indebted and forever thankful.
Thank God, I’m good!